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President Trump Pardons Turkey

WASHINGTON: ‘Twas quite a day at the White House on Tuesday as President Trump decided to pardon one of two turkeys presented to him in the Rose Garden in the afternoon. According to USA Today, the annual tradition was punctured with plenty of impeachment jokes from the president himself.

When presented with Bread and Butter—two extremely large turkeys that were raised in North Carolina—Trump joked about the turkeys’ ability “to remain calm under any condition, which will be very important because they have already received subpoenas to appear in Adam Schiff’s basement.”

He went on to add: “It seems the Democrats are accusing me of being too soft on Turkey. But Bread and Butter, I should note that unlike previous witnesses, you and I have actually met.”